'We are like this only'- Seven Indianisms every Writer should avoid !!

English. Brought to India, by the British during the colonial period.

But, let’s face it, there’s English and then there’s Indian English, which shockingly, made its way to most of the dictionaries too. Whoa! That’s news.

Indianism, is defined as a characteristic of Indian English. Just one of the few things, which we, as writers, should avoid.

Let’s highlight, just a few examples of ‘Indianisms’, shall we?

    1.   Only

“We are like this only”, “They are there only”. Our innate desire to add ‘only’, at the end of every sentence. Ugh! Your sentence doesn’t need a companion, you know.

    2.  The ‘I, me and myself’

Remember all those phone conversations, with the person introducing himself as, “Hi, myself...” 

Annoying, isn’t it? I never understood it either. When did “I am..”, get out of fashion?

     3.  ‘Yeah’

American much? 

Let me tell you, a simple “Yes” still counts. Why pretend to be someone you are not?

     4.   Revert back

Just when you thought we couldn’t get any weirder, there it comes, “I will revert back to your mail.”

Revert is described as ‘to return to a previous state.’ And, adding ‘back’, doesn’t really make much sense.

     5.    The “Basically”

Supposed to indicate that a statement summarizes the most important aspects. But, mostly used 5 times in a single sentence in contexts where it is not needed. Yes, that’s the ‘Indianised’ version.

     6.   Prepone

Origination: India.

Because, using ‘reschedule’ is way too mainstream. Even if it’s incorrect, that won’t stop us from using it, now, would it?

     7.  Out of Station

“Hi, where are you?”

“Hey, I am out of station.”

“Oh yes me too, right outside, buying a packet of chips.” Duh!

Unless, you are a train, it’s better to use, “out of town”, or “Will be back to Bangalore, in 5 days,” instead.

If only, we realized that we can still be proud of our Nation, if we used proper English, instead of our ‘grammatically-incorrect-suited-to-ourselves’ version. And, in the process, be better writers too! 

Rakshabandhan: KIDS Vs ADULTS. *How the symbolism changed,But meaning of the festival didn’t!*

Indians = NORMAL.

Our festivals = NORMAL.

But Indians+ Our Festivals = That’s some epic shit :D

Enthusiasm, Excitement, and loads and loads of Entertainment.The 3 E’s that define any Indian festival. Because, we are a breed of people who love being extreme about everything.

Dressing up, being energetic, curious to know what your brother got you this year! The rituals. Shopping for the cutest Rakhis ever, because you want your brother’s Rakhi to stand out. Boys showing off their Rakhi-covered hands, and comparing, taking pride in the fact as to whose hands have the most numbers.

Sounds lame, right? But, that’s what its like to be a kid. Carefree.Over-excited.Lame as hell. And it all heightens, because,let’s face it,  INDIAN KIDS.

As a younger sister, for me, Rakshabandhan was one of the most awaited festivals of the year. No, No, no sentiments. Just because I was the one receiving all the presents (haha), as a wide known fact: Gifts are to girls, what Cricket is to Boys :D  

As we grew up, and life happened, Rakshabandhan became more of an obligation than a festival. 

Tying the Rakhi, converted into Facebook posts; going shopping for Rakhis converted into Whatsapp Images , and presents converted into Bank transfers. 

But, what didn't change, was the meaning of this festival!

The promises that a sister makes; that no matter what, her brother will always be her best friend, her lifelong confidant,her favorite person to talk to about everything. 

The responsibilities that a brother takes; that he’ll protect his sister against all odds,break bones of the guy who breaks her heart, and will do anything to make her dreams come true.

A brother –sister relationship is more of a love-hate one.True! 

But, dare anyone say a word against our sibling, we will rip their throats out with our teeth!

For a kid, who’s this excited for Rakshabandhan, it was difficult for me to understand the first time when my brother wasn’t home for this holiday. He was miles apart in his college, and me at home. Although, I am pretty sure, if he had been home, we would be fighting our asses off (haha), but all I could do, was cry my heart out to him over a phone call. I guess, it’s true what they say, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder.” 

With time though, we begin to realize the things that actually matter, and that they shouldn’t be taken for granted like we used to, when we were a bunch of 5-year olds. Because, eventually, the beauty of every moment lies in the fact, that we have our loved ones to celebrate it with, no matter if they are towns apart. It goes without saying, "Asli maza sabke saath aata hai" [The real fun is with EVERYONE]

We have our dedicated dates to these festivals, whether it be Mother’s day, Father’s day, Daughter’s day, or Rakshabandhan. But, the pleasure is celebrating it throughout the 365 days, with the same innocent passion that we did it with, when we couldn’t even pronounce them.

Somehow, writing about it, made all those years of  past Rakshabandhans, flash right in front of my eyes.

Happy Rakshabandhan, to all brothers and sisters out there!

10 Things You'll Relate To If Sarcasm Is Your Thing(Or Genius,if I may!!)

Read somewhere, "Sarcasm is used for destructive purposes".Ummm...then let's go have a War of Words. Duh?

Lets face it, There's no such thing as "Too much sarcasm", just like there's no such thing as "Too much coffee."

For the people who understand Sarcasm,you know that it's more contagious than Malaria. And, there are some characteristics which distinguish you from the Lame-ass Crowd. #truthtold

1. The number of people who describe you as funny are many, but so are the one's who refer you as an “Unfunny Asshole.”

2.  If you were Omnipotent, you would probably declare 'Sarcasm' as the National Language.

PS And why not, after all Irony is better than Guns right?

3.  Sarcasm Level: Chandler Bing!

Sarcasm is so natural to you, that it comes out, even without you realizing it.

4.  Seriousness vs Sarcasm.

They say, with great power comes great responsibility. True.

But, they should also know, with hilarious wit comes the art of never being serious. 

There might be a serious topic going on, and well people expect you to be too. But,too much awesomeness cannot be contained, and so the witty in you comes out in the open.

5.  To you, a fellow sarcastic person, is like your long-lost twin :P

From taking Tips from one-another, to wise-cracking people all around, when you meet a fellow sarcastic person, it’s like the *Wisdom of the Wits.*

6. Compliments aren’t really your thing.

Well, truth told, compliments don’t really excite you.

Might sound strange, but when someone says,”You are cute”, either you will Laugh out Loud, rendering the person in shock, or you’re like “Jeez.Wow....I had no clue”

7.  Meeting stupid people is to challenge your Wit to sit through :P 

When you are hanging out with people who don’t understand your sarcasm, you’re like “You need to buy a new set of Brains please” 

You find their inability to understand Sarcasm, as a sign of Stupidity.Because let’s face it, Sarcasm isn’t everyone’s cup of tea. 

8. Advice= Apocalypse.

 To you, giving advice, is inviting apocalypse. 

9. Emotions are expressed way better with Wits.

Excited, angry or normal,whatever the state of mind, you never go outta style. 

Whenever there’s mixed emotions, and people try to interact with you, your wisdom spits from your mouth, and people mark you as “Arrogant.” Well, if you can’t handle my comment, then just stop talking.

10. The phrase, “I am kidding” has become your signature dialogue.

You say, “I am Kidding” more than you breathe every single day.

Why? Seriously, why? Because let’s face it. OFFENCE.

Offence is to most people, what DISCOUNT is to shoppers, you take it without questioning as to why![Layman Explanation: Where there’s a Discount, you don’t question the Product Quality].

No matter, what others say, Sarcasm is indeed the best defense mechanism, and isn’t it better to put your mind to better use? 
Because, let’s be honest, there’s nothing more wise than a Witty mind.